"I found the snipe!"

Week 3:

Week 2 was a blast. I had lots of fun with my friends and family down here. I missed home, but I wasn't as homesick am I now. I am still very grateful for this adventure and ministry opportunity. I have learned a lot about myself. For example, I probably won't leave Maryville once I graduate. I will probably stay there unless God has other plans for me. I have also found out that writing is a great way for me to say how I feel. I can fully express myself and I love writing. I may not be the best at it, but I love it. I may not get all the views in the world, but it's about who is reading it and not how many people are reading it. I understand that my blogs are long and take some time to read, but I really do appreciate the people who come back each week just to listen to how my week has been going. I also appreciate the people who have been praying for me.


So my week hasn't been eventful at all so for the right now, I am just going to mainly talk about Saturday and Sunday because I was semi-productive those days so far this week (it's currently Wednesday), but after that I will probably just ramble on about something that I find relevant to the people who read this.


Saturday June 4:

    So today Joanne and I just stayed at the house all day watching movies and just chilling out. So I got to sleep in that day and it was glorious. Tonight I went to band practice. I don't think I have ever been that frustrated in my life. I had no idea what songs we were doing. I had never heard those songs in my life. So you can image as to why I was frustrated. I didn't know what I was playing. Back at home, we have in-ears so that you can hear what you are playing and what everyone else is playing. I miss those a lot. Times like that really made just want to pull my hair out. So I walked out of practice not knowing what tomorrow was going to hold. So after practice, we went and saw the new Ninja Turtle movie. I have never really been into that stuff, but I kinda like it. It's genuinely funny and it's clean humor. They didn't have any profanity in the movie at all. After the movie, we went home. Before I went to bed, I remembered what Pastor Tommy had told me before I left," There will be times of frustration, but don't let that stop you." So I just told myself that we will try again next week and that we will get the list of songs that we are doing so that I could have a jump start. Then I went to sleep.

Sunday June 5:

      Today was a good day. Church was really good. Pastor Roberto talked about how God has a promise for you and he is faithful to you. It was really powerful. After church, we went to a mall to grab food. We went to Fuddruckers. It was so good. After that we went and walked around the mall. Joanne and I went into a store and found emoji pillows. We took pictures and laughed for a good 10 minutes. Then her mom joined us in the fun. We took pictures by a really big bear. We got a phone call from Pastor Roberto telling us that they were waiting in the car for all three of us to come back. We were on the other side of the mall. Once we got into the car, the most amazing thing happened. They were playing the most amazing music, Disney music. I knew every single Disney song that played and I knew the scene and what movie it came from. It made me realize that I am still a little kid inside. Once we got home, I went to bed, but I was woken up early the next morning because I had dreams about my parents passing away while I was gone. I cried. It made me really sad. That was when I realized that I was home sick. I had never experienced homesickness before, but I knew that
this was it.

                                                                     


          I haven't really done anything this week because the schools are on a vacation for a week so I'm hanging out at the house and preparing myself for the schools. I have also started thinking about what I am going to tell my youth group when I get back. I know that I will talk about the trip and what happened, but I also want to talk about what happens to someone once they are pushed way outside of the comfort of friends and family. You really find out what you are made of. When you go on a mission trip with your church, you have people that you know are going, but when you go live with people that you don't really know for 6 weeks, you really find out a lot about yourself. For example, I found out how much I really do love my parents and all they do for me. You really find out where your treasures lie and who you really rely on. This has been a reality check for me so far. It's made me realize that position doesn't matter. It doesn't matter if you are a pastor over a church or you are someone who just attends the church, we all need Jesus the same amount. All of us need to acknowledge that in this crazy life, we still have Jesus. I have also learned how constant he is. He is the same God in the US as he is everywhere else. Who is more constant then that? NO ONE. I am starting to learn what it means to be content in him. As a young teenage girl growing up in the US where people are getting married really young, it's easy to wonder why I haven't met the man that God has for me, but I am learning that you need to truly fall in love with Jesus before you fall in love with someone else. He is the provider. How could you not be content in him? I want to have true joy and have true peacefulness because I am steadfast in him not because there is someone on this planet that will make me happy. God knows when I will get married and I don't. So why wouldn't I trust him and be patient? When you really think about these things, you see how the world entangles you in believing that the way to true happiness is through a relationship. God is the only way to achieve full joy. There's a difference between joy and happiness. Joy is everlasting, while happiness is here for a second.  I want the joy of the Lord to be my strength, not what other people think of me. I want the peacefulness of the Holy Spirit, not the acceptance of other people. God already accepted me. If someone doesn't accept me, then it's okay. Honestly if you ever get a chance to get away like this or to go on a mission trip by yourself do it. You learn who you really put all your trust in. It gives you a whole new prospective of life and how you should be drawing closer to God everyday. It teaches you so much about God and his faithfulness. Every time that I get homesick, I am reminded that God is with me and that he will be here to comfort me wherever I go. He has comforted me every time I have called out to him. Psalms 34:4 says," I sought the Lord, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears" (NIV). One of my mentors had shown me this verse when I was going through some scary stuff and this verse has been ringing in my heart ever since. God is just so good and faithful in the good and the bad times. As you continue on with your week just remind yourself that God is always there for you and loves you. Just trust in him.

Here are some pictures from this week: 

My favorite Panamanian dish

Trying to be our favorite Emojis

The bear wanted to come to town